War Buddies | Week 2

The big idea

I should let my destination determine my friends, instead of just letting my friends determine my destination.

Real, deep friendship — the kind combat veterans and David's mighty men found in the fire of shared mission — comes from agreeing on a destination first. If we know friends shape where we end up, the wise move is to choose our friends based on where we are trying to go, and for a follower of Jesus that means leaning into people who are leaning into Him.

Point 1 of 7

Pastor Bill opens with a video of a combat veteran, Hal, and his sergeant major, and notes that every combat vet interviewed described a level of friendship they never expected to form on the battlefield. He asks whether it was the mission and agreed destination that came first, or the friendship, and answers that the destination came first — the friendship was formed through it.

Point 2 of 7

He grounds the series in the theme verse Proverbs 17:17, explaining that a friend loves at all times and has your back, and that friends are literally born for adversity. He argues that God's people are meant to watch out for each other under a shared mission the way soldiers do under fire.

Point 3 of 7

Reading 2 Samuel 23, Pastor Bill tells the story of Shema, who stood alone in a lentil field to protect defenseless Israelites when the rest of the army fled. He points out that David found these mighty men among outcasts and criminals in the wilderness, and that their friendship with David, forged around a shared destination, changed who they became.

Point 4 of 7

He turns to Amos 3:3 and applies it to Israel's tendency to claim God as their destination while chasing after their neighbors' gods and ways. He says the obvious answer to the question is no, and presses that this is really a discipleship question about whether we truly want to follow Jesus.

Point 5 of 7

Working through 2 Corinthians 6:14, he clarifies this isn't a call to Puritan-style separation, using the salt illustration to say Christians are meant to be scattered among unbelievers, not bagged up together. He introduces the principle of the lean, taught to him by his youth pastor, saying our deepest, most-leaned-into friendships should be with people leaning toward Jesus, or Jesus gets left out.

Point 6 of 7

He cites Matthew 16, where Jesus tells His disciples to give up their own way and take up their cross to follow Him, and connects that cross-bearing to the discomfort of choosing community over convenience, including the extra-grace-required person in every group.

Point 7 of 7

He tells the extended story of his son's difficult years, being pulled by friends into trouble, and how yelling about picking better friends did not work. Only when his son personally chose Jesus as his destination did his choice of friends, grades, and character begin to change.

Take it into your week

Pastor Bill's charge is to stop letting friends decide where you end up, and start letting where you're going decide who you walk with.