COUNTER CULTURE | Week 2 | Sermon · Rewind

COUNTER CULTURE | Week 2 | Sermon · Rewind

Pastor Daniel Goulding · Sep 17, 2024

Big Idea

Quoting the message: Forgiveness isn't easy, but it is freeing, end quote. — and the only way to forgive without limit is to remember how much you've already been forgiven.

Jesus calls His followers to forgive not a set number of times but without limit, because forgiveness is the path to real freedom. It won't feel fair or come naturally, but when we remember the crushing debt God has already forgiven us, we find the faith to release what others owe us, and it is us, not them, who walks free.

Key points

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1Peter's question exposes our instinct to put a limit on forgiveness
Peter asks Jesus if forgiving someone seven times is enough, having already doubled the rabbinic standard of three times. Pastor Daniel explains that Jesus answers with what sounds like a math problem but is really a correction: the question isn't how much forgiveness we owe, but how much freedom we want to experience.
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2Jesus commands forgiveness for the repentant, and even the disciples admit they can't do it on their own
In the parallel account in Luke, Jesus says a believer who repents must be forgiven, even seven times a day, and the apostles respond by asking Jesus to increase their faith. Pastor Daniel notes that this response is honest and universal: in our own power, we don't want to forgive, and forgiveness will take faith that isn't natural to us.
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3Forgiveness is not forgetting, not fair, and not a feeling
Pastor Daniel lays three ground rules before the parable: forgiving someone doesn't mean pretending it didn't happen or staying in an abusive or toxic situation; it isn't fair, since the offender hasn't earned it, just as it wasn't fair that God forgave us; and it isn't a feeling we wait to arrive, but a decision we make by faith that our feelings eventually catch up to.
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4The parable of the unforgiving servant reveals the true size of our debt before God
Jesus tells of a servant who owes his master millions (in today's terms, billions of dollars) and cannot pay. Pastor Daniel explains the twist: the master is God and the debtor is us, since Revelation describes God keeping a ledger of every sin in thought, word, and deed, a debt we could never repay on our own.
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5The master pays the debt himself, which is the picture of the cross
Rather than erasing the debt or leaving it unpaid, the master reaches into his own account to settle it, which Pastor Daniel connects to Jesus becoming human, living the life we couldn't live, and taking on the wrath we deserved so our debt could be fully paid, not just ignored.
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6The forgiven servant refuses to forgive a much smaller debt, and it costs him everything
The servant who was forgiven billions grabs a fellow servant by the throat over a few thousand dollars, and the king hands him over for it. Pastor Daniel says this shows we must learn to forgive not according to what people deserve, but according to what we've already received from God.
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7Unforgiveness is a self-built prison, and only we hold the key
Pastor Daniel explains that holding onto unforgiveness doesn't punish the other person, it tortures the one holding the grudge, rebuilding the very prison Jesus already released us from. He distinguishes forgiveness from reconciliation, noting forgiveness requires nothing of the other person and is something we do to free ourselves, not them.

Application

Pastor Daniel asks the church to plant a flag in the ground and choose, today, to release the person or situation they've been holding onto.

Name what you're holding onto
Pastor Daniel asks each person to identify the specific situation, person, or issue they've been refusing to let go of, whether it's betrayal, a broken family relationship, or a wound from a friend or coworker.
Choose to forgive by faith, not feeling
Since feelings never catch up first, make the decision to forgive as an act of faith even when you don't feel like it, trusting that your emotions will follow the choice over time.
Set boundaries without withholding forgiveness
Forgiving someone doesn't mean forgetting what happened or staying in an abusive or toxic relationship; redefine friendships and reset boundaries as needed while still releasing the debt.
Fix your gaze on what you've been forgiven, not what others deserve
Remember the size of the debt Jesus paid for you on the cross so you can extend forgiveness according to what you've received rather than what the offender has earned.
Raise your hand and release it to God
In the closing prayer, Pastor Daniel invites people to physically signal, hand raised, a decision to release the person or situation to God, asking Him to fill the void with love, grace, and mercy.

Take it into your week

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Scripture in this message

From the transcript
“Matthew chapter 18, the story begins in verse 21. It says, then Peter came to him, being Jesus, and asked, Lord, how often should I forgive somebody who sins against me”
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From the transcript
“Look at this exact same story told in the gospel of Luke because we get a little bit of the disciples response that we don't see in Matthew. It says in Luke 17, same story, it says, one day Jesus said to his disciples”
From the transcript
“Go back with me to Matthew chapter 18, reading in verse 23, Jesus again answering the question to Peter, how much do we have to forgive”
From the transcript
“Go back with me to Matthew chapter 18, reading in verse 23, Jesus again answering the question to Peter, how much do we have to forgive? He says, therefore, the kingdom of heaven can be compared to a king”
From the transcript
“the Bible is clear. Revelation 20 says that God is actually keeping a ledger of all of our sins. He actually has a list of every time we've made a mistake”
From the transcript
“Look at the very next line of this story. Okay, this guy has a $6,000,000,000 debt, verse 26, he makes the fatal flaw that we will all make, but the man fell down before his master and begged him”
From the transcript
“See, this is what Colossians says that Jesus did for you and I. Colossians chapter two says that you and I were dead because of our sin, and because our sinful nature was not yet cut away, but then God made you alive with Christ”
From the transcript
“He says in verse 28, but when that man, that man who was forgiven $7,000,000,000, he left the king, he went to a fellow servant who owed him a few thousand dollars and he grabbed him by the throat”
From the transcript
“and that Ezekiel 36 moment happens, where we truly are born again, the heart of stone that we used to have has been removed and we've had a heart transplant with a heart of flesh”
From the transcript
“Look at how Jesus closes this whole parable down. He says in verse 34, then the angry king sent this man to prison to be tortured until he had paid his entire debt”

7-day devotional

A personal reading plan from this message — scripture, reflection, and prayer for each day.

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Day 1

Peter's question sounds reasonable on the surface: 'How many times should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?' He probably expected a gold star. Seven was already generous by the standards of his day. But Jesus answers with a number so large it stops being a number — seventy times seven. He isn't giving Peter a new quota to track. He is dismantling the idea that forgiveness has a logical endpoint at all. Pastor Daniel pointed out that the real question underneath Peter's question is this: how much freedom do you actually want? When we put a ceiling on forgiveness, we are really putting a ceiling on our own peace. We become the accountant of every wrong done to us, and that ledger is exhausting to maintain. Jesus isn't asking us to pretend the hurt didn't happen. He's inviting us to stop letting the hurt set the terms of our lives. That reframe is worth sitting with today — not as a guilt trip, but as a genuine question: What would it feel like to not be keeping score? The invitation isn't to be a doormat; it's to be free. And freedom, Jesus suggests, is available in far greater supply than we tend to imagine.

For reflection

Where in your life have you quietly set a limit on how much you're willing to forgive — and what has maintaining that limit cost you?

Pray

Pray for honest awareness of any hidden scorecards you may be keeping, and for the courage to bring them to Jesus.

Small-group discussion guide

For leading a group conversation about this message.

Open

Think of a time you watched someone let go of a grudge — maybe in a movie, a story, or real life. This message is about what Jesus says is actually happening in that moment, and why it matters more than we might expect.

Discussion questions

1
In Matthew 18:21-22, Peter asks Jesus how many times he has to forgive — up to seven times — and Jesus answers with 'seventy times seven.' What do you think Jesus is getting at with that answer? What does it tell us about how He frames the whole question of forgiveness?
2
In the parable, the king forgives a servant an enormous, unpayable debt — and then that same servant refuses to forgive a much smaller one. What does Jesus seem to want us to feel or understand as we hear that contrast in Matthew 18:23-27?
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Pastor Daniel made a distinction between forgiving someone and pretending what happened was okay — he said forgiveness doesn't erase consequences or require reconciliation. How might that distinction change the way people think about what forgiveness is actually asking of them?
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Colossians 2:13-14 describes God canceling 'the record of the charges against us' and nailing it to the cross. How does that image connect to what Pastor Daniel said about our own debt before God being the fuel for extending grace to others?
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Pastor Daniel said that unforgiveness functions as a self-imposed prison — and that releasing someone is less about benefiting the offender and more about our own freedom. What do you think makes that hard for people to believe or act on?
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Pastor Daniel described forgiveness as a faith-driven decision, not a feeling — and said our feelings tend to follow our actions over time. How might that reframe the way we as a group talk about or support one another through the process of forgiving someone who has caused real harm?

Pray together

Gratitude for the debt that has already been canceled — and courage to extend that same grace to others

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Topics

Forgiveness Freedom From Unforgiveness God's Grace Radical Forgiveness The Unforgiving Servant

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